Get Midlife Clarity On What's Next For You In Just 2 Minutes A Day!

Episode 57 | (00:00):
Hey there, friend. Let's talk about midlife clarity. Oh, what would we do without it? Well, from my personal experience, a lot of wandering and roaming around without direction or purpose. I mean, that's just from my own experience. ;)

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Not having that direction, that purpose, or not being clear on what's next for you, I can say with great authority that it does not feel good. As a matter of fact it feels awful, and I don't want any of you to have to go through that.

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So to nip those "lost years" in the bud, we're going to look at an age-old practice that has been proven over and over again to be exceptionally successful when trying to get clarity as we set our vision for our lives. So are you ready to do this? Are you ready to actually get a plan and move forward? Let's dive in!

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Hey there, Easy Ager. If you are not already on the Easy Aging® Insiders list, go to TheEasyAgingShow.com right after this episode and sign up.

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Today, we're talking in a little bit more detail about visualization. Visualization has been proven, scientifically proven, to help people from all walks of life succeed in whatever they're going after. And while that's fantastic, I think visualization is also a great way to help you get some midlife clarity on what's next for you...

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Whether you're looking for your purpose or improving your health or starting a new creative project or maybe you're just trying to figure out what you want your day or your week to look like. It's a safe way to step into possibility with a minimal amount of risk.

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Actually it's no risk at all because when you're visualizing something, you get to try on different hats. You get to check out different options to see what feels right for you, to help you decide if you want to pursue something or not.

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Getting midlife clarity means you're spending the time you need to step into possibility. Wringing your hands and saying, "Oh my gosh, I feel so unfulfilled. I don't know what my purpose is"...

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None of this is going to help you get anywhere good. It's just going to make you feel bad about yourself, and you're going to start feeling hopeless and directionless and we don't want that, do we?

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If you're wondering exactly how to do this visualization thing, let me give you some specifics.

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Number one, ask yourself questions. You may have already done this from other episodes, but this is a really important part of figuring things out. You want to become an investigative journalist of you. So you're going to be asking yourself a lot of questions, okay?

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You might want to grab a notebook to write some of these questions down. The first question is, what part of my life do I want to change?

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I start with this question for myself because I don't know about you but sometimes, when things aren't going well, I get frustrated and say, "Oh my gosh. This is horrible. I have to change everything. I want to completely reinvent myself."

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And I go in about 17, maybe 18,000 different directions and then I fall flat on my face and I'm even more frustrated at the end of that. So here's what I do. I start with the question, "What part of my life do I want to change?" Because for most of us, it's not everything.

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Maybe you want to change your finances, maybe you want to change your health, maybe you want to upgrade your relationships. It's probably going to be one, maybe two things. I would encourage you to work on one thing at a time so you don't go into overwhelm.

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But the reality is, ask yourself this question and sit down and figure out what, exactly, you want to focus on. When you decide that, then you start asking other questions like, "What makes me happy? When do I feel most content? What fulfills me?" Those are the types of questions that are going to start getting you more and more midlife clarity.

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And then the last question is, "What part of my life do I want to excel in?" Now, this is a little bit of an odd question I'll admit, but let me give you an example.

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This past weekend, for the very first time, I went axe throwing and I had an absolute blast with my friend Donna. It was so much fun. I was kind of proud of myself because I got a few bull's-eyes and that kind of surprised me. Yeah, that was me. I'm patting myself on the back over here.

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Because I had so much fun and because I got my bull's-eyes, this little thing inside me started being a little bit more intrigued. It's that little spark that just started prompting me to ask more questions like, "Do I want more of this? Do I want to invest some time in this? Could I really enjoy this, maybe as a new hobby or something? Could I potentially be good at this?"

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Those are the questions that move us into number two: see it. Start painting the picture of what you want your life to look like. And if it feels a little weird at the beginning, well, I don't mean to alarm you but that's pretty much to be expected. The first time we do anything, it's always a little awkward, don't you think?

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So you're probably not going to get this perfect picture your very first time. That's why it's important to do this regularly. Your picture is going to evolve. It might start off being a little light and sketchy at the beginning but the more you do it, the richer and more detailed it's going to become.

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Creating a rich, detailed picture is imperative because you want to speak directly and clearly to your subconscious mind. Your subconscious responds readily and easily to images and feelings. And at this point, I also feel the need to put in another disclaimer: No, this is not woo-woo. This has been scientifically backed up.

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In episode 23, I gave you an overview of your subconscious mind so you might want to check that out again. In that episode, I gave you the picture of the elephant and the little boy on top of the elephant.

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The elephant is charging through the jungle, taking down trees and plants and birds and anything else in its way. Then you see the little boy sitting on top of the elephant, gently tapping it on its left ear or its right ear, telling it which direction to go in.

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Your conscious mind is the elephant. Your subconscious mind is the little boy who's giving all the directions. But we think it's just the opposite, right? We think our conscious minds are running the show when in reality, it's our subconscious minds that are very much in charge.

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The other thing to know about your subconscious is that it only knows how to say "okay." So give your subconscious mind a very clear picture of what you want and it'll say "okay," and then it will start setting things in motion to get there. Sounds crazy but trust me, it works.

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Now that's a great start, but if you want to strengthen your picture even more: number three, add emotion to it. Your subconscious responds readily to images and feelings. Keep remembering this, okay? If you create a very vivid picture of what you want, then you connect it to an emotion, your subconscious will make things happen.

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Think about it: How are you going to feel when you have, do, or become all the things that you have in your picture? A lot of people don't mention this emotion part when they're discussing visualization, but adding the emotion pretty much seals the deal for your subconscious. With that emotion, it now has everything it needs to start putting the wheels in motion.

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Number four, sit with it. No, I didn't say sit on it. (Didn't Fonzie say that? I think he did.) Sit with it. Capture that feeling you have when you experience your picture and remember it. Hold onto it. Don't let it go too easily. Don't say, "Oh, that was nice" and then wander off. No, no. Stay with the picture and the feeling as long as possible because you want to be pulling this up again and again and again.

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Imagine how you're going to feel once you've found your midlife purpose or you've lost the weight or you're enjoying that new daily routine that you've just established. Lock that picture and feeling in, and come back to it as often as possible.

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And that moves us into number five. Imagine how you're going to tackle the obstacles. It's great to create the end picture but if you really want to supersize your vision, walk yourself through the obstacles. What's going to hold you back? Where do you have a tendency to fall back into old habits or to fall into your old self-sabotage?

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By this time in midlife, we all have a pretty good idea of where we stumble and where we go wrong. But by picturing yourself in those situations, you can also picture what you're going to do when it happens. You can mentally rehearse that solution over and over again so when it actually occurs, you'll take the right path, you'll make the right choice and you won't flinch.

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And that means you won't have to be stopping and stumbling around and trying to figure out what you're going to do in that moment. Being prepared for these moments will help you move through them with more grace and ease, okay? Just be realistic about what can potentially hold you back, and deal with it in advance.

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So that's it for today. Let me do a quick recap for you. Visualization can help you get midlife clarity on your purpose, your health, or just about anything else you want to work on. Here are the steps for your visualization practice.

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Number one, ask yourself questions and become an investigative journalist of you.

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Number two, see it. Paint the picture of what you want things to look like.

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Number three, add emotion to your picture.

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Number four, sit with the picture and the feelings for as long and as often as possible.

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And number five, see yourself tackling those obstacles in advance.

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You're going to start with our typical fun-sized action of 2 minutes once a day. Then you're going to increase your time and your frequency as you get better and better at this, okay? You want to be doing this for as long and as often as possible. That's just going to get you there that much faster. How cool is that?

(10:43):
Once again, if you are not already an Easy Aging® Insider, go to TheEasyAgingShow.com and sign up right now. I'll see you in the next episode and until then, peace, love and blessings to you and yours. Take care. Bye-bye!