Deal With Midlife Disappointment Like A Pro: 3 Simple Strategies That You Can Use Immediately

Hey, Easy Ager. Today we're diving deep into a topic that we all face at some point in our lives: disappointment. I'm going to share the top three ways to handle disappointment in midlife so you can get through it and bounce back faster. How cool does that sound?

I specifically wanted to talk about disappointment this week because I'm going through one of my own disappointments right now. I initially thought, "Things are going in the right direction. This is fantastic!" I was getting really excited and then things didn't work out.

Generally, we get disappointed because of someone else's actions or because circumstances changed. But this time it was all me. I created my own disappointment by making a decision. I felt odd about a couple of things in this situation and something felt a little off. So I did what I always do when these things come up. I prayed about it.

I always turn to God in these situations because He knows a lot more about what's going on than I do. Plus, it's a relief to know there's someone in charge who's significantly more competent than I am. So I prayed about it to get clarity and wisdom. I got the answer pretty quickly, but I didn't like it.

Has that ever happened to you? You're thinking, "Oh no, I must have heard that wrong. That can't be right." So I prayed about it some more, and simply confirmed the original answer that I didn't like. I made my decision based on that.

I let myself be sad for about a day, and then I was done. And that's one of the great things about being in midlife. When I was younger, even the smallest disappointment would knock me out for a few days or a few weeks. Sometimes, it was even months. Now I run out of steam for wallowing in 24 hours or less, so things don't hit me nearly as hard as they used to.

Let's talk about three ways to deal with midlife disappointment.

1. Don't avoid it, deal with it

Disappointment is like a fly at a picnic. The more you try to shoo it away, the more it hangs around and keeps bugging you. Since disappointment is a part of life, it's important to learn how to deal with it head-on rather than resisting it. Otherwise it will come back and bite you in the behind when you're least expecting it.

For example, if you worked hard for a promotion at work and didn't get it, the natural response is disappointment. You might feel let down; you might feel frustrated or even a little bit angry. But those feelings are perfectly normal, and it's important to acknowledge them.

Instead of bottling up and ignoring those emotions, embrace them. Acknowledging them takes the sting out of them. It dilutes their power over you.

And if you do this for a few times, the whole thing is going to eventually become a little blip on the radar. You're going to be thinking, "Oh, that happened and now I've moved on."

The key to all of this is to let it out in healthy ways so you can process the emotions appropriately. Talk to a friend. Write in your journal. Pray or meditate. Take a walk outside without your earbuds and listen to the birds. These types of things are going to help you move forward faster, and that's what we all want, don't we?

One more thing to dealing with disappointment in a healthy way is making sure you take some time to process your emotions, but don't start wallowing. That's sometimes a very fine line to walk.

When you wallow, you're setting yourself up for a little trip to the land of depression and hopelessness. Trust me, that's a place nobody wants to visit. Set a time limit if you need to.

For example, with my most recent disappointment, I gave myself 24 hours to be sad. (I actually lost interest and was done in about 12 hours.) If this were a bigger loss, my time frame would be longer. Pay attention to how long you're allowing the disappointment to stick around and adjust accordingly.

2. Embrace a new perspective

Disappointment is basically when reality doesn't line up with our expectations. But to navigate it with ease, the secret isn't about trying to change the way things are. It's about changing your perspective. Trust me, that's a lot easier than trying to change reality.

Think about a time when you were let down by a situation or a person, and try to look at it from a different angle. Find the good. Maybe this disappointment is a doorway to something better. Sometimes it feels like God is saying, "No, not right now. Not this. I've got something even better for you. I've got something even greater waiting for you on the other side of this."

For example, a failed relationship could be the nudge you need to rediscover your passions. A missed job opportunity might push you to explore career options that align better with your values. Who knows?

Next time you experience a disappointment, look for the silver lining. You might just find a fantastic opportunity waiting for you on the other side of things.

3. Redefine success

We often attach our sense of achievement and happiness to specific outcomes.

But what if I told you that success can be redefined to include the process of learning from your disappointments?

Imagine this: You set a goal. You gave it 100%, and you fell short. When disappointments start setting in, that's when you should pause and redefine your view of success. Because success isn't only about reaching the destination. It's also about the journey, what you gain from it, and how much you learned from it.

For instance, let's say you want to lose 20 pounds, but you only managed to shed 10. Instead of beating yourself up over those last 10 pounds, why not celebrate the progress you've made? Enjoy the healthier habits you've built, and embrace the knowledge that you've gained about your body and what works for you. And if you lost 10 pounds once, you can do it again, right?

(As a side note, in my experience, there is no "one size fits all" when it comes to health and nutrition. God made each of us to be unique. When you're dealing with weight, you'll probably have to experiment with a few things before you find out what's perfect for you.)

By redefining success, seeing what you've learned and how much you've grown, you'll find that the journey itself becomes fulfilling. Thus, the phrase, "the joy is in the journey." Doing this means your setbacks becomes stepping stones. Your disappointments become your teacher and are going to guide you toward your true aspirations and what truly matters in your life.

By this age, disappointment is just a part of life. But by implementing these strategies, you can transform it, learn from it, and move forward more quickly than you normally would.

 Grab your free copy of How To Reclaim Your Energy And Kick Midlife Blues To The Curb: A Simple Guide

Check out the Easy Aging Facebook Page